Linking Muluzi, Bingu and E-mail

E-Mail is short for electronic mail. This is the process of sending text messages in an electronic form. The messages can include images and video clips. This form of sending mail is instant. One of the disadvantages of this system of sending messages is that once you click send your document goes, whether incomplete or with errors, it is so fast that immediately you put an address and click send it can even go blank without a subject.

In 2004, the minute Dr Bakili Muluzi clicked send, Bingu Mutharika went.

There was no time to recall him, Bingu went whether with errors, incomplete or blank we do not know, the one who received the mail knows.

That is how easy it is to link Muluzi, Bingu and E-mail. Now, the question lingering in peoples minds is about Muluzi’s come back into politics. Is it to retrieve the e-mail or he enjoys the game of politics.

MISTAKE.

His political bedfellows complain that he made a mistake to choose Bingu.

We shall all end up speculating the motive behind the choice but the truth remains with Muluzi himself.

Every individual has the right to his or her own opinion but for Muluzi, the Timau crew respects him. He is one of the greatest politicians after the geniuses of the 1964 cabinet .

If our economy was to be controlled from London and politics in Lilongwe, I would go for Muluzi. He has a humorous way of transmitting his political messages to people.

He does not have to build Mikuyu or Mzeleka prisons to keep down his opponents, he simply uses words, "Mukamandiwona mumandiyesa ine bebe,(do I look like a baby to you) Ndimatekeseka ine! Ndintunda winatu uno". That is enough to scare off his political opponents.

They just leave him, "sichitekesekatu ichi" (We cannot move him), about AIDS , he simply says, " mudzipeleka dimu azimayi.." the following day Hannover street along Ryalls Hotel becomes clear of all prostitutes.

He is a political comedian, with the words, EYETU EHH!!he sends thousands upon thousands of his admirers into stitches of laughter. How he does it, nobody knows.

KINGDOM

Having decorated Muluzi with all the painting, he has to be reminded that Malawi is not a kingdom.We do not want to create small royal families. He had his chance that's it.

It is not said or written in the scriptures that thou shall rule Malawi at will.

Watch out Dr Bakili Muluzi!

There is a faction within UDF who have gone so broke and believe that if they come back into government they will top up their lost capital. This group of people is also engulfed with vengeance. They are so bitter with some individuals in the present government that they want to revenge.

What with songs like ‘adzatimva’,(ino ndi nthawi yawo nafe yathu ika kwana adzatimva)(this is there time when ours come they shall see) these expressions do not speak nice of a democratic party.

This sector of people believe to win an election on their own is an uphill battle.The only way they can come back into government is by winding up Muluzi. The unsuspecting Muluzi simply agrees to the concession. They are so crafty to the point that they have managed to convince him.

"Bwana munthuyu munamuyikapo nokha ndiyenso ndinu nokha mungathe kumuchotsa!" (you brought up Bingu so its only you who can bring him down)

Shrewd as they are they know that amongst themselves there is no true leader worthy the salt to turn the minds of Malawians.

They want to turn Malawi into a kingdom to meet their selfish egos. What they forget is that Muluzi is not sacred.

In 1994, it was the euphoria of the moment that pushed UDF into power.

Malawi had termed its own Lion. As it matured it became less social and would not have remained habituated to the human group, it started dragging people to Thambani forest to feast on them. Malawians were fed up. They wanted change. Anything could have done it.

Bringing Muluzi back will be disastrous to his political career if he loses and if he wins this set of people will reap off government, oppress their opponents, to them they will not care but this will tarnish Muluzi’s name and destroy his political orgasm.He will thus retire as a miserable political failure.

The above forecast should not make Muluzi to stand off in the 2009 elections but to jolt his memory as he puts his house in order.

Definitely, he does not want to click and send an e-mail that will make him regret once more.

DPP AND GRASS ROOT POLITICS

In the 1994 elections, Bingu’s UP did not do well. That is the respectful way of putting it.

They were even below Kamlepo Kalua’s MDP.

To people who track Malawian politics, it clearly showed lack of grass root politics on the part of Bingu’s party, a disease which seems to be incurable in the party.

The economy is fine but in reality it is only economists or people with related knowledge who understand that, not even a graduate in arts worst still a vendor would easily notice the same. That is why we say that Bingu has to dwell on grass root politics. The opposition is eating up DPP’s time.

The people in DPP who are supposed to frame the way forward are busy stitching up patches of section 65, deliberately brought on tabel by the opposition to subvert DPP.

Look at Harry Mkandawire, nothing personal, he is a good leader but lacks political focus.

His statements are very challenging and suffer political stamina. Bingu should realise that Malawians have got their own ways of being spoken to.

You click send on your computer and Malawians go, you will never have them back. Ask Baba Tembo. You can not salvage an e-mail, once send its gone.

The way Patricia Kaliati warbles with issues reminds the Timau crew the way MCP erred with the Bishop’s pastoral letter.

Cut my index finger, Kaliati will one day commit a blunder similar to that of MCP that will cost Bingu his comfort at the new state house.

Check her Mr. President before you send a blank e-mail with no subject.

The best way to govern is not through threats, people get tired with such things quickly.

WORKSHOP

We propose that the DPP Politburo should go to Mangochi for a one week workshop to drill them up in public relations , communication skills and above all to instil political discipline in them.

How can a politician call a former head of state a satanic at a public rally with no standing evidence.

How can a cabinet Minister , a lady for that matter, mention sex stuff in parliament and later on at a press conference in front of journalists.

It is these small looking things once sent make a party lose its credibility.

If Malawians click send, there shall be nothing like it was Kaliati then. DPP will have gone with mistakes, incomplete or blank pages with no subject .

WHEN TWO BULLS FIGHT

The fight between DPP and UDF can easily make John Tembo, leader of MCP grin with joy.

Some little self acclaimed geniuses in politics do not give Tembo a chance. If you go by election results, you will find that the same Malawians love his( Tembo’s) party.

In 1994, when the party was totally ostracised by many Malawians what with late Chakufwa Chihana’s hype, MCP was voted second by Malawians even beating the most popular Chakufwa Chihana’s AFORD.

In 1999, Gwanda Chakuamba, then MCP, cried foul, he believed Malawians wanted him and MCP.

In 2004, John Tembo wept. Elections were rigged. He(Tembo) and his MCP had won the elections only that UDF rigged, Tembo sulks.

Now, if Malawians do not like him who votes for him? Is it Zambians?!!

Watch out.!!!

What with the stupidity, DPP is doing in the North with their Harry Mkandawire.

Northerners are tricky. Somehow, due to his lack of grass root politics, Harry Mkandawire takes them for granted. The Timau crew can see Mkandawire if unchecked, clicking send and northerners going.

They will wake up one morning and say," mbwenu taleka chipani ichi ti votele Tembo" because they will not vote for Muluzi in multitudes.

In the centre with scandals like the one at Kasungu and the funeral catastrophe, it is easy to hear people shout," odala ntheladi nachileka chipanichi nambwelela kwa baba Tembo"

With the DPP southern region committee in shambles , I want be surprised to hear, "isi nkhalile ziti ntochisiyaje ine chipanichi".

In an event of the above turning into reality, and the two parties DPP and UDF fighting, Tembo can easily take over .

Mind you, it is always the euphoria of a particular time that changes the wave.Remember, once an email goes you can not call it back. Do not make mistakes, double check everything.

Atcheya is still looking for his e-mail he sent in 2004, he can not retrieve it. He clicked send hurriedly.

This article is dedicated to Kamva Makuta a Malawian based in the United States of America.

TICHEZE –FROM THE TIMAU CREW.

Whatever is written on this column is for the good of our country.

It is there to provoke debate.. This is our opinion , what is yours?- that is why you have the opportunity to comment below.

Timau column welcomes your views, criticisms, disparagement's etc but when you are angry and too emotional please do not CLICK and SEND your comment like a MR. YAMMS , who absolutely missed the reasoning behind the article ‘The day Bingu will Dance one Big break dance’ and commented, "..noways Bingu is not boring U are the one who is boring and dull.." These are very unfriendly words considering the fact that it is you (Mr Yamms) who failed to understand the story. The story was actually praising and defending Bingu.

Yamms, I think your hero(Bingu) has never been praised and defended like in that article ever since he came into power.

Ironically, just below Mr. Yamms comment, Mr Ernest Chikonga writes, ‘..my lungs are aching with laughter.. give us more of these humorous articles.

The article duped William ,' Vehicles with expired MOT on our political roads'. He thought the Timau crew was talking about real cars when he says, ‘ I cannot see any reason why MPs should not afford to buy computerised cars’ and he further says ‘am no mechanic but am just wondering how the hell a car which they stopped producing spare parts 50 years ago should still be usable’ mmmhmmh, come on William, you are still in a 1958 motor vehicle jump into this 2008 car. Ask someone to tell you what the story is all about. In short, we are talking of people who have been in parliament since independence. Dont you worry you will soon get used to the way Timau tanga comes out.

MOT =COf we thought that was obvious as the story clearly explains.

Hands Kawoko sided with Timau but a Mr Mavuto Akula and Mr Chembe Chilunjika had their own thoughts . We have taken them in.

What about this one gentlemen......

FAST COMPUTERISED VEHICLES RISKY ON OUR POLITICAL ROADS.

Mavuto Akula and Chembe Chilunjika, we will give you this one soon.

Mavuto Akula calls a member of Timau crew Msembe no Sir, he is Sembe.

WE love uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Basi Patricia Kaliati mawa ati anthu aja ndi a UDF , no, this is short cut for ‘WE LOVE YOU’

WEEEEE love UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Enjoy Nyasa Times.

sembegondwe@yahoo.com