Malawi ruling DPP’s needless fights -Muckracker

 “You must not fight  too often with one enemy, or you will teach him all your art of warNapoleon Bonaparte

Can someone tell the DPP-administration that it is high time it started governing and stopped picking needless – if not nonsensical – fights? I mean, it is not like someone will wake these fellas up one day and tell them Maxon Mbendera was just tantalising them that they won May 20.

Look, I like Foreign Affairs Minister George Chaponda. He is quite a nice guy; affable, approachable and quite intelligent too.

But sometimes the Yale-trained lawyer needlessly sticks his shoe in his mouth. Remember the other year he made Malawi become the butt of jokes when he suggested that the ‘fouling air’ laws his government was formulating were meant to criminalise ‘farting in public’?

Dr Goerge Chaponda:

Dr Goerge Chaponda:

Wow! Because of the good lawyer all things Malawian became fodder for jokes across the globe for talk-show hosts and stand-up comics – of which his fantastically funny son, Daliso, is coincidentally part.

When he realised he had made a cartoon of himself, Chaponda tried to talk his Solicitor General into helping him salvage his soiled image. But the judicious Anthony Kamanga could have none of it. He respectfully retorted to his boss: “You fouled the air yourself, Sir, you clear it yourself too!”

So, good old George, egg all over his face, did the mea culpa all by himself and accepted that farting in public – embarrassing as it may be – is not exactly illegal even in a funny country like Malawi.

One would have thought that, after his embarrassing moment of infamy, Chaponda could have learnt to think before opening his mouth.

But hell, no!

Look, I can forgive Patricia Kaliati for accusing Joyce Banda of ‘stalking’ her successor, Peter Mutharika. I can I understand from whence Akweni is coming.

But not the Yale-trained top diplomat of the country.

For starters, Joyce Banda did not – could not – gate-crash the United Nations summit. She was invited to attend and speak at specific side events of the summit like the women leaders’ demonstration on climate change and the ‘A World at School’.

In fact she was not the only former leader; Gordon Brown and others were also there.

There may be several issues Joyce Banda owes the nation an explanation for, but certainly not her UN junket.

Look, if Chaponda and Kaliati are to be believed that the President was not aware of the former president’s engagements in New York, why did he have to hire a whole train-load of advisors for?

I mean, I have been privileged to attend a number of international events. Booklets containing schedules and speakers – including their profiles, are circulated months before.

Even if she wanted to sneak out to these conferences, Joyce Banda could not have pulled it off because her name was all over the conference booklets for crying out loud!

Or, perhaps, the plane-full of advisors and hangers-on Peter took to the Big Apple were only there to ogle – and smile themselves silly – at the Statue of Liberty?

By the way, even if we are to believe the Chaponda-Kaliati fantastical tales that Joyce Banda sneaked out, how did she found herself in New York? On foot?

As a former president she is not only entitled to a diplomatic passport but also access to the VVIP services at the airport.

Now, as our chief diplomat, Chaponda must know that the Airport Commandant cannot open the VVIP lounge without prior instructions.

Or is Chaponda conceding that the DPP government is so inept it does not know what is happening around it? Do we not have one Nicholas Dausi heading a band of sleuths whose job must be taking note of who is going where, doing what, why, meeting who and for what purpose?

Come to think of it, the brouhaha surrounding Joyce Banda’s junket to New York is exposing the DPP administration’s soft under-belly. Look, Chaponda is saying that if his incompetent government (do not blame the Muckraker for that adjective, blame Chaponda for a government that does not understand what is happening within itself must be truly incompetent) had known Joyce Banda would be addressing certain events, government would not have sent delegates to the same.

What balderdash! That was, in fact, the more reason government should have attended her events. I do not want to believe Chaponda, whom I respect so much, was part of the misguided people who mis-advised First Lady Gertrude Mutharika to give Joyce Banda’s first ladies’ event a ‘no-show’.

Angoni Getu should have risen above the local petty politics and be the first one to congratulate Ama and give her a bear hug after she made her keynote address. What an awesome picture it could have made!

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He has always failed and disappointed me. Some times one is tempted to think that education does not stump out stupidity in ones dunderhead


Why would you expect good from bad. Every face they say tells a story

Brenda bongowongo

Raphael Tenthani is great writer not these myopic Lomwez. Usess, senless, foolish dogs. Fokofu lomwez


Tell Them About Reality Chaponda Kaliati Manyazi Bwa!

Cliff K Gama

One thing we must always remember is JB did her part for our nation.She found this country on a verge of collapsing.There was no forex,no fuel,many companies were closed and the elections were to be held in 90 days from her ascendancy to power DPP could not win the elections.Please Leave her alone.


You have picked jabs LEFT,RIGHT BACK AND FRONT From Tenthani, thats why you are runting like this ,Thumb up Mr Tenthani, Tell them the truth and only the truth will set us free from this Propaganda.


Spending so many years in classroom does not make you an expert in decision making. You can spent so many years , but end up being educated salvage . I don’t know which school only teaches people to criticies always Mr Aferazao. People who always see mistakes have a mental problem, because even their own wife is always criticised. Criticism can be accepted and most of the time should be constructive not because you hate the govt. May Jehova help us, otherwise Malawi will remain poor country for ever because of other people who are trained to criticise everything.

The northerners should not fool us. They managed to disturb the whole country with their quota system issue by pretending to hate Bingu on governing issues and went on to convince donors to stop helping Malawi now they are bringing this fedaularism issue the South and the Certral region angokhala phwiii. Musagone tulo abale. Let’s work up against the wakwithu syndrome which has terrorised Malawi since Kamuzu era. Do you think Kamuzu was foolish when he sent the Northeners back to their region? These wakwithu guys would want to brain was us with the agendas that will benefit themselves and… Read more »

Chaponda, Chaponda, Chaponda, how many times did I mention your name? For once stop reasoning like a goat header at the foot of Mulanje mountain. Please, please a Jijo differentiate yourself from the village foul mouthed Kaliati.

Tenthani Lovers
Most of the comments here show there is a group that like Tenthani’s articles no matter what rubbish he writes. If indeed JB was invited,on what capacity? Was it as former president or as JB? If she was invited as former president,the government should have been aware and synchronize with her on some issues because in that case,she was representing Malawi. Can’t Tenthani see there was need for that? Is he too blind to see that even the Brown he is talking about did that!! No matter how much you hate this government,protocols should be followed. There is no parallel… Read more »

Achimwene,if you don’t know issues or mukalasi simunalowemo mungokhala chete than kutichititsa manyazi kkkkkkkkk Tenthani is a geneous than you lol.He was a BBC correspondent at one point so shut your probosis


manyazi bwaaaaa tenthani is right oooooooh shame on you


Sour grapes. If you cannot understand what Tenthani writes because you spent less years in the classroom you better shut up your stinking mouth kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk


Tell him


You ugly shit,it seems you have nothing to offer Malawians so just shut up your stinking mouth and sort out your millions of personal problems.Cant you write anything about other parties.Your jealousy will take you to hell. DPP still has Five years to go,so I ask you to keep your ink For serious times ahead.You are as porridgic,porous and empty as your girlfriend Jessie kabwira.


I think you need to calm down, at this rate you will give yourself a heart attack


There is enough ink don’t worry. Just make sure that you don’t run out of calmness else you run mental.

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