Dzuka Malawi:  New names for President Chakwera

December 18, 2020 Rudo Tariro –Nyasa Times 59 Comments

After elections, I go on mandatory six months break. Yes sought of writing quarantine. I thought I would write again in January 2021. But hey, the new President has more nick names in six months than five of his colleagues before him.

President Chakwera

Imagine, in six months, the word itsanana has disappeared from social media, replaced by Siku transport, Kwenda Jenda, Matako akana Pansi and recently Vilemi Dazi. Seriously Peter Mutharika the immediate past one had only “adadi, clueless, a ton of bricks, and prince of thieves”.

Joyce Banda before Mutharika only had “Chiwongolero, Abiti Kuyenda, Abiti mundege,  Azungu Andiuza and Mpavuuu”.

Bingu wa Mutharika had “Chitsulo cha njanje, Mose wa lero, Ndikunyenyani, I am not Jesus and Mr Stupid”.

Bakili  Muluzi carried “Makolija, Agama, Mwini Matipate, Anyamata a pa town, Kuchitekekete and of course Atchair”.

Kamuzu Banda had over 50 of them, include ‘Mpulumutsi, Alidzi’ but  won’t repeat  all of them here.

These titles either means the public is admiring you or rising against you. They mean you are popular in delivering your promises or failing.

Bingu became “Mose wa lero” for improving the economy and making us feel fresh again.

JB was a dear Chiwongolelo from saving us from the DPP train derail.

Muluzi mwini matipate for simply knocking off Kamuzu. And Chakwera itsanana was acknowledgement that Malawians felt good and honoured that their will had prevailed.

Six months down the feeling, the President is being referred as “Siku transport with its slogan- here today, there tomorrow.”

Let’s take this week I am writing, Salima Armed Forces, Nkhatbay planting trees, Karonga security houses launch before that you find a President with an engagement every week.

The President should travel yes, but only when necessary. For projects I would advise State House to only accept invitation to open houses or project not launch it. Launches should be left to heads of departments.

Then you have the Vice President loudly proclaiming he will inspect 335 projects across the country. Is that really his job? How different is it from Ministerial site visits and what impact will his eyes seeing have to the project save for a few podium directives?

Seriously MG 1 and MG2 convoys competing in crisscrossing the country? They never paid attention whilst many slept outside the shops looking for cheap fertilizer. They never paid attention while hospitals like Kamuzu lack scanning equipment, they never pay attention that jobs are being lost every day as taxes go up and MRA acts like an enemy of small businesses.

They never pay attention to that Ministers are implicated in all sorts of shady deals from Nocma to State House to contracts with Asian businesses. They don’t pay attention that an Asian owned company got a US$15 million-dollar water contract when a Malawian owned charged US$12 million.

Then they have National-In-Law in Chief trying to justify useless things from Jerusalem risk to Mozambique ill-advised decision to announcement of new Kamuzu Academys when kids in primary schools are still being killed by trees and classrooms.

The first six months of the administration look clueless and out of touch with reality. They seem to be happy to eat the money and enjoy the job. Their priority has been to bloat a cabinet, hire advisers for everyone, hire a spokesperson, personal assistant, a driver, and a guard for each Minister.

Then tell Malawians- we are going to Jerusalem and Lagos (Nigeria capital is Abuja), ask the unemployed youth to create jobs, dismiss critics and blame DPP cadets for sabotage when they are still using the same generators to steal, the same Nocma to eat and the same Asians to rip off Malawians.

As we wrote during the DPP regime and PP regime, arrogance has a price. So far Tonse Alliance has started off badly, very bad, that soon their name tag will be longer than any other President, unless of course, they change.

Please don’t ask Malawians to create jobs, you promised 1 million jobs to deliver them. Anyone who tried to reason with you was mocked. You promised a universal subsidy, we are waiting. You promised free water and electricity connections, we are waiting. You promised us a cheaper passport and driver’s license, find a way to  give us. That was the contract you offered, we accepted it.

If you won’t deliver, well JB and APM will tell you how we do it in Malawi. President sabweleza masiku ano akamanvela anthu otumbwa ngati Chisale. I hope MCP will stop fighting SKC and all work together to deliver their promises. Dzuka Malawi, Dzukani a President, zinthu sizilibwino

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59 replies on “Dzuka Malawi:  New names for President Chakwera”

  1. Putting too much premium with greasy faced so called ” man of God” as if he is the one who put the breath in your lungs. I would put the anaethesiologist on the pedestal of man of God. Atleast he can knock the wind out of you when you need surgery and wake you up. This fake nyau dancer Chakwera is full of mabi ndowe and everything else foul and yet he is the man of God. MCP Chipani cha imafa and indeed resurrected by code Lazarus. Amalawi munansakha nzukwa ya Biblios AKA BIBLE And called it your leader. The only leader you must have is God, his spirit and yourself. This facka Chakwera is not even qualified kukolopa chimbuzi, He is a bonafide embezler. Wakumva amve.
    Man of manyi. MBUZI CHAKWERA AND TEAM SEAN KAMPONDA MANYI

  2. The article started off well and then derailed into an emotional rant. While the points being made are somewhat fair, there are so many issues that needs fixing in Malawi and I doubt that all the things you have mentioned here can be fixed inside a year. Why don’t we give them a year and maybe judge on what they are doing right and what they are doing wrong and then use proper channels to voice our concerns to the govt. I do not expect this govt to fix everything but I do hope that they will try to put the people first.

  3. Honestly I have enjoyed your writing. Power nakes is see not what everyone sees. Free word of advice

  6. Zipangani defend mbwelerazi..anthutu akulankhula osati kudana kaprna kuipitsa ai.koma kuthandiza kukonza,ndiye enanu mukamalimbana ndi odzudula,anyway ena ali panja nkhani zake nzomwezi…ngati mmayesa.kut anthu.samakutsutsani,ndiye zikuvutani..iyi ndi democracy..leaders must listen and act accordingly..

  8. It was better if you had maintained your earlier decision to go on holiday and start writing next year if at all you will have sobered up by then. You do not write as a journalist but a politician desperately trying to win sympathy by way of simple and clueless rhetoric. Instead of yourself pointing out that these names for the president have been invented by yourself out of hate you push the same to Malawians. You obviously need rest and healing. Go well and revise your journalism lessons and come back fresh and be objective.

  9. Its too early to judge Dr Chakwera’s performance in just 6 months. Truth be told, Chakwera built his campaign on the High 5 agenda. That is what we should jjdge him on his first term. The other dilemma of the serial promises were not Chakwera’s promises but Chilima. Chilima is the one who made all those crazy, unreasonable and unrealistic promises of 1 million jobs, free this or that, cheaper this or that. Unfortunately, for MCP and Chakwera, upon hammering an alliance with UTM, they blindly followed the crazy UTM policies. Let us not be too harsh on Chakwera. Let us judge him by His High 5 pledge.

    1. 6 months is adequate time for his leadership to be assessed. Actually, it would be better if he’s assessed on the same 6 months basis every year.

    2. Mwana wamfupi amadziwika akangobadwa therefore the direction of this government is already known. We cannot see any plans in place may be let’s wait and see.

      1. President Chakwera said six month he will asses his cabinet so even to us its good time to assess him.the same measure and duration he will use on his ministers, we will also use to measure him.

  10. Timanena ife kuti mukamasankha mtsogoleri mudziyang’ana kumene wagwira ntchito kuti “how was his leadership there”. Assemblies of God inalira uku, funds kusowa, leadership problems, even ku MCP kumene, a Kabwila ndi a Richard Msowoya anachotsedwa komweko! Ife nkmatenga kukaika Ku state House, these are the results, sitinati.

  11. Kukacha kuchuluka zoliralira tiyeni tizigwira ntchito osati neng’a pamwala kuchapa madeya iyayi dzikoli silitukuka 👊🏿🇲🇼

  12. The Tonse Alliance needs to apply “Occam’s Razor” to get back on track in delivering to the Malawian people. This theory holds that “the simplest explanation (or solution) is usually the right one”.

    In the case of getting back on track, the President, his Vice and all Cabinet Ministers need to reduce their travel by about two thirds. They should be in their offices supervising, giving critical advice, ensuring that their staff have the necessary resources and authorizing (where necessary).

    Just imagine this: If you are able to read this comment, then you went to Primary School, then Secondary School and possibly college. Would you have been able to get an education if your Headmaster, or Principal was always on the road, with the teachers and admin staff left to their own devices?

    The President is the CEO of the country, while ministers are CEOs of their respective ministries. If they are always on the road then the country (and the individual ministries) are going to suffer. It’s as simple as that…

  13. Chakwera ndi mbuzi ya munthu. Chindalama, kwacha mmene yikugweramo nthawi ya PM inaliko stable pano ichita kufika 1 to 60 ndi rand ndithu. Sadziwa kuti matako akana pansi wake akupanfmgitsa ndalama kuti idzigwa kwambiri? Apangidwe impeach ngati sakutha kuyendetsa dziko.

  14. some reporters will choose to disregards all positives govt is doing and only focus on negativity and unfounded mudslinging propaganda. I know there are some malawians who rejoices in reading gossip, unfounded theories and negative stories, but as for me i do hate coming across such stories. what is the benefit of such propaganda to our nation at this time of the year? and if chilima and chakwera disbands, who will be greatest losers? if its us all including you, then why pushing for it to happen? be responsible reporters and focus on positive thoughts please in the name of Almighty God Jehovah.

    1. Go back and read the article again? Where in the article is the author has said that LMC and SKC should disband? And you say you hate coming across stories full of propaganda yet your comment is full of them. Lol, very pathetic of you!

  15. I don’t think Chakwera will change: He is who he is. Like APM before him, he seems to think that being President is all about personal glory – and not about hard work trying to improve the lives of the people who voted for him.

    However, any cabinet minister or senior public officer under Chakwera can still have a meaningful impact on the lives of fellow Malawians. All it boils down to is getting the basics right; getting things done, instead of being on the road all the time. You start with the objective that you are going to try your level best to make a difference AND you get down to doing just that. You don’t work alone; you work with others. A few quick examples of Malawians who have made a difference (or are still continuing to make a difference) include the 5 Constitutional Judges, Martha Chizuma, Justice Chifundo Kachale, General Nundwe, selfless healthworkers throughout the country, etc. In the past we have had people like Professor Chimphamba, and Bingu in his first term making a big difference.

    You do not have to be perfect: You just need to have your priorities right, and realize that nothing gets done on its own. Get the basics right and chances are high that you’ll get good results…

  17. all what u nyasa times jounalist do and enjoy is to demonise mcp choncho sibwino kapena mumatumidwa eti news yodanitsa

  19. Warnings come through Prophets. I can see a prophecy here. Did I hear Vilemi Dazi??? If you don’t deliver, APM will tell you how we do it in Malawi. Shaaah.

  20. Kodi Bingu anakwanitsa bwanji kubwezeletsa chilichonse Mmalo
    Kumachita ife kudabwa kuti ndi izizomwe amazidziwa kuti sizilimundondomeko
    Ife nkumavomeleza kuti inde zimayenera kumakhala chonchi
    DZUKA CHAKWELA

  21. Chiphwethelele cha PULEZIDENT
    ndie uyu CHAKWELA
    AmaMINI BUS akungolira tsiku ndi tsiku
    Iwo amadandaula kuti amadula misonkho pamene business akumapanga ndi amaBLACK NUMBER
    Dziko kukhala ngati mulibemo mutsogoleli

  22. Chakwera is the “Talk Talk” President. Nothing but Talk and Talk. Chakwera is a tribalist, a nepotist. And sadly a tool of the extreme right wing evangelist in USA. Whatever Chakwera says is just Talk Talk. Soon Chakwera will be Life President Wamuyaya.

  24. Writing an article out of anger won’t help us as a nation. Let Chakwera and Chilima do their job, you wanted all the promised be fulfilled in less than a year? Who told you that MCP is in fights with Chilima? Bring an article with substance not this trash. Amene akutumaniwo akuyipitsirani mbiri akulu.

    1. If he cannot fullfill even one promise within a year why is he making some more promises like building more than 300 houses for police officers, constructing schools like Kamuzu academy,constructing mosoleum for Orton Chirwa without even thinking of compensating the family. Is he serious or he is trying to tease malawians.

    2. Kudana ndi chilungamo. It’s hand clappers like you that set the bar too low for our president. So far Chakwera has started badly. Nothing to show

    3. They are not doing their jobs. That’s why people are on them. If they had been doing their jobs your call to let them do their jobs would’ve been valid.

      Look, we Malawians have suffered a lot on the hands of politicians. Every President that has ever lead Malawi has treated us as cash cows. They capitalised on our poverty to fill their pockets. They looked at us as their opportunity for opulence. Each one of them has made billions out of our suffering. They have made us to see politics and party colours more than what’s missing on our table and what services are missing in our hospitals, schools and bank accounts. Enough is enough!

      I have come to the resolve that the true positive change of our nation is not with politicians. It is with us ordinary Malawians, the citizens.

      Malawi says no to continuously enriching families of politicians.

      Malawi says no to politics of words be it with African accent or American accent.

      Malawi says no to being milked and stupidified by politicians.

      This government took my vote which created a contract between them and I. My vote obliges me to hold this government accountable.

      I didn’t vote for the statehouse to be managed by the president’s son in law. Honestly, for goodness sake, can’t the President see how sour and mockery to Malawians such an appointment is. We sent the previous governments packing coz of the same conduct and He takes us for fools on the same point. They promised us jobs for our children little did we know they meant their son in laws. When they said “Tonse” they meant them and their son in-laws.

      Talk of Chilima, he is forever busy with showmanship and on ego trips. He is so obsessed with building his own image. His motives are not for the better of Malawians but for himself and his family. He follows the spot light, not the starvation of Malawians. He is after the media headlines not the cries of Malawians. He sees this whole this’d an opportunity to build his image with stunts for future presidency instead of working for it. This whole comedy of travelling around to monitor all these projects, it’s not for governance purposes, no! It’s for ‘cameraship.’ What are these ministers for – a clear sign that he either doesn’t know what his role is or he chooses to ignore it and go on these self image parades.

      These politicians have one thing in common = They don’t care about us.

      Malawi we are on our own. Our future is not in the hands of these politicians. Malawi we must champion our own course to forge a future for ourselves and our children, these politicians are there for themselves and their families.

  29. These names will change nothing. One thing i know is that Chakwera achieved his dream of becoming the president of this country. Whether he will be a one term president that is not an issue and it should not bother you.

  30. This is you Rudo not Malawians, i wonder where do you journalist get this power of talking bad things about the presidents in Malawi. Lets put it straight, the one you are calling all those names is the father of someone, just like your father, how can fell if your father can be called that such names on your scale as a child? I tell you My fellow Malawians, according to the law of humanity, we are asked to respect our leaders, one of the respect we are carrying in our respect is to make sure that we are obeying them, just by obeying them, we have done the right thing which can not let our own mind to give them these all names! may you fell bad after hearing some one calling your father all those names, what do you think Nick will feel after hearing you calling his father those names? what Nick can feel, may you feel the same .
    Atola nkhani nagti mukuona kuti muli ndi mphavu yonyoza wina aliyese chifukwa choti muli ndi mwayi wolemba, i tell you that the anger of God is just with your family. We cant sit here reading all these insults to the leader of this Country. This must end, change your mindset, if you dont want to change, let it be known that we are going to fight in this Country because i can not allow you to be insulting presidents in this way!!It is not your right if you think it is. you dont have that authority of insulting presidents in this country and this must stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ngati ndi umphawi ukukupangitsani zimenezi, you have nothing to get from this type of life. May God see you. I challenge you, God in Heaven is looking at you as am writing i can feel pains because it is not good at all! lets change Malawians please please please!!

    1. Your comment is no sense. Why did Chakwela join politics and leave the pulpit? Are his promised being fulfilled? If he used to cheat his church members, this is politics, we follow whatever one says. The article is very clear and straight forward and whatever is written is true. If Chakwela is your relative just go to him and tell him to fulfil what he promised malawians otherwise it will be talk, talk and Siku transport.

  32. On this one.. am sure we can debate. There is no blue print on presidential interaction with various activities. If he remains locked up in State House we will be the same people to say Nkhuku ya chitopa. I recall Muluzi said “President asavakashe”. Let him see where people live

    1. The issue is not traveling but rather what he is accomplishing in the travels. Honestly speaking so far this has been the government of words and no clear agenda supported with action.

  33. Che Matako akana pansi AKA Zakanembo is the dumbest and clueless President Malawi has ever had. His VP bwana Zeze is loudest mouth and serial liar just like Satan. This combination will tear this country into peaces. The five judges, Trapence and Mtambo are more evil. But God is watching!!

  35. The content is stronger than the title. zinthu sizilibwino. Padzikopa pali mavuto awiri. UTM idachita chipongwe; idaiponyera game patali. MCP singakwanitse zonse UTM idalonjeza chifukwa adalowa m’boma clue zero. Chofunika ndi kutsetsa fight between MCP and UTM. Ngati MCP sisintha they will be biggest looser. zoona ndi zakuti; akadalora kuti Ghetto boy atsogole; ntchito zilunenedwazi akadazipeza. ntchitozotu sikuti kulibe; zilipo koma anthu olankhulira boma adasanga ena oba certificate, ena apongozi. what do you expect.

  37. a good post, but let the leaders, do their job, its their time, during your time you traveled too.
    During their campaigns i did not have much time to see them but now they have visited my home village to me its a plus!!!!!

    1. That’s exactly what people are angry about. In your remarks you have just actually made a point as why people are not satisfied.. opening a webpage shouldn’t be expensive in this day and age. For the fact that you are complaining about it, it just shows how respective governments including this one in whom we had high hopes have failed us.

      See, these politicians makes us so partisans to a point where we fail to see the truth even if it’s right in front of us.

  42. Ichi mchiyambi chabe awa atimalidza ndipo atiphikadi mu ndende yaukapolo yomwe tinathana nao mu 1994 muja

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