Dzuka Malawi:  New names for President Chakwera

After elections, I go on mandatory six months break. Yes sought of writing quarantine. I thought I would write again in January 2021. But hey, the new President has more nick names in six months than five of his colleagues before him.

President Chakwera

Imagine, in six months, the word itsanana has disappeared from social media, replaced by Siku transport, Kwenda Jenda, Matako akana Pansi and recently Vilemi Dazi. Seriously Peter Mutharika the immediate past one had only “adadi, clueless, a ton of bricks, and prince of thieves”.

Joyce Banda before Mutharika only had “Chiwongolero, Abiti Kuyenda, Abiti mundege,  Azungu Andiuza and Mpavuuu”.

Bingu wa Mutharika had “Chitsulo cha njanje, Mose wa lero, Ndikunyenyani, I am not Jesus and Mr Stupid”.

Bakili  Muluzi carried “Makolija, Agama, Mwini Matipate, Anyamata a pa town, Kuchitekekete and of course Atchair”.

Kamuzu Banda had over 50 of them, include ‘Mpulumutsi, Alidzi’ but  won’t repeat  all of them here.

These titles either means the public is admiring you or rising against you. They mean you are popular in delivering your promises or failing.

Bingu became “Mose wa lero” for improving the economy and making us feel fresh again.

JB was a dear Chiwongolelo from saving us from the DPP train derail.

Muluzi mwini matipate for simply knocking off Kamuzu. And Chakwera itsanana was acknowledgement that Malawians felt good and honoured that their will had prevailed.

Six months down the feeling, the President is being referred as “Siku transport with its slogan- here today, there tomorrow.”

Let’s take this week I am writing, Salima Armed Forces, Nkhatbay planting trees, Karonga security houses launch before that you find a President with an engagement every week.

The President should travel yes, but only when necessary. For projects I would advise State House to only accept invitation to open houses or project not launch it. Launches should be left to heads of departments.

Then you have the Vice President loudly proclaiming he will inspect 335 projects across the country. Is that really his job? How different is it from Ministerial site visits and what impact will his eyes seeing have to the project save for a few podium directives?

Seriously MG 1 and MG2 convoys competing in crisscrossing the country? They never paid attention whilst many slept outside the shops looking for cheap fertilizer. They never paid attention while hospitals like Kamuzu lack scanning equipment, they never pay attention that jobs are being lost every day as taxes go up and MRA acts like an enemy of small businesses.

They never pay attention to that Ministers are implicated in all sorts of shady deals from Nocma to State House to contracts with Asian businesses. They don’t pay attention that an Asian owned company got a US$15 million-dollar water contract when a Malawian owned charged US$12 million.

Then they have National-In-Law in Chief trying to justify useless things from Jerusalem risk to Mozambique ill-advised decision to announcement of new Kamuzu Academys when kids in primary schools are still being killed by trees and classrooms.

The first six months of the administration look clueless and out of touch with reality. They seem to be happy to eat the money and enjoy the job. Their priority has been to bloat a cabinet, hire advisers for everyone, hire a spokesperson, personal assistant, a driver, and a guard for each Minister.

Then tell Malawians- we are going to Jerusalem and Lagos (Nigeria capital is Abuja), ask the unemployed youth to create jobs, dismiss critics and blame DPP cadets for sabotage when they are still using the same generators to steal, the same Nocma to eat and the same Asians to rip off Malawians.

As we wrote during the DPP regime and PP regime, arrogance has a price. So far Tonse Alliance has started off badly, very bad, that soon their name tag will be longer than any other President, unless of course, they change.

Please don’t ask Malawians to create jobs, you promised 1 million jobs to deliver them. Anyone who tried to reason with you was mocked. You promised a universal subsidy, we are waiting. You promised free water and electricity connections, we are waiting. You promised us a cheaper passport and driver’s license, find a way to  give us. That was the contract you offered, we accepted it.

If you won’t deliver, well JB and APM will tell you how we do it in Malawi. President sabweleza masiku ano akamanvela anthu otumbwa ngati Chisale. I hope MCP will stop fighting SKC and all work together to deliver their promises. Dzuka Malawi, Dzukani a President, zinthu sizilibwino

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Chakwera nyau dancer
Chakwera nyau dancer
3 years ago

Putting too much premium with greasy faced so called ” man of God” as if he is the one who put the breath in your lungs. I would put the anaethesiologist on the pedestal of man of God. Atleast he can knock the wind out of you when you need surgery and wake you up. This fake nyau dancer Chakwera is full of mabi ndowe and everything else foul and yet he is the man of God. MCP Chipani cha imafa and indeed resurrected by code Lazarus. Amalawi munansakha nzukwa ya Biblios AKA BIBLE And called it your leader. The… Read more »

Ulemu Banda
Ulemu Banda
3 years ago

The article started off well and then derailed into an emotional rant. While the points being made are somewhat fair, there are so many issues that needs fixing in Malawi and I doubt that all the things you have mentioned here can be fixed inside a year. Why don’t we give them a year and maybe judge on what they are doing right and what they are doing wrong and then use proper channels to voice our concerns to the govt. I do not expect this govt to fix everything but I do hope that they will try to put… Read more »

Last edited 3 years ago by Ulemu Banda
Mangochi South West
Mangochi South West
3 years ago

Honestly I have enjoyed your writing. Power nakes is see not what everyone sees. Free word of advice

Kudya katatu patsiku
Kudya katatu patsiku
3 years ago

Kamwendo m’njira ameneyu

Ndata Boy
3 years ago

kusowa zolemba………….vuto la kudya katatu ndi limeneli, mukakhuta mmagona kenako mwayamba kulemba muli ntulo

Chkoti
Chkoti
3 years ago

Zipangani defend mbwelerazi..anthutu akulankhula osati kudana kaprna kuipitsa ai.koma kuthandiza kukonza,ndiye enanu mukamalimbana ndi odzudula,anyway ena ali panja nkhani zake nzomwezi…ngati mmayesa.kut anthu.samakutsutsani,ndiye zikuvutani..iyi ndi democracy..leaders must listen and act accordingly..

Igbudu
3 years ago

hehehehehehe siku transport. anyanya.

Mahemba
Mahemba
3 years ago

It was better if you had maintained your earlier decision to go on holiday and start writing next year if at all you will have sobered up by then. You do not write as a journalist but a politician desperately trying to win sympathy by way of simple and clueless rhetoric. Instead of yourself pointing out that these names for the president have been invented by yourself out of hate you push the same to Malawians. You obviously need rest and healing. Go well and revise your journalism lessons and come back fresh and be objective.

Anzelu ndi Anzelu
Anzelu ndi Anzelu
3 years ago

Its too early to judge Dr Chakwera’s performance in just 6 months. Truth be told, Chakwera built his campaign on the High 5 agenda. That is what we should jjdge him on his first term. The other dilemma of the serial promises were not Chakwera’s promises but Chilima. Chilima is the one who made all those crazy, unreasonable and unrealistic promises of 1 million jobs, free this or that, cheaper this or that. Unfortunately, for MCP and Chakwera, upon hammering an alliance with UTM, they blindly followed the crazy UTM policies. Let us not be too harsh on Chakwera. Let… Read more »

Ngenje
3 years ago

6 months is adequate time for his leadership to be assessed. Actually, it would be better if he’s assessed on the same 6 months basis every year.

Ndife
Ndife
3 years ago

Mwana wamfupi amadziwika akangobadwa therefore the direction of this government is already known. We cannot see any plans in place may be let’s wait and see.

ndalama
ndalama
3 years ago

fokofuuuuuu!!!!!!!! cadet cindcate

F. B.
F. B.
3 years ago
Reply to  ndalama

President Chakwera said six month he will asses his cabinet so even to us its good time to assess him.the same measure and duration he will use on his ministers, we will also use to measure him.

Chikafu
Chikafu
3 years ago

Timanena ife kuti mukamasankha mtsogoleri mudziyang’ana kumene wagwira ntchito kuti “how was his leadership there”. Assemblies of God inalira uku, funds kusowa, leadership problems, even ku MCP kumene, a Kabwila ndi a Richard Msowoya anachotsedwa komweko! Ife nkmatenga kukaika Ku state House, these are the results, sitinati.

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