Hail DPP govt, full of fluff… Welcome to ‘War and Peace’

It seems, by and large, the Democratic Progressive Party (DPP) has finally started getting everything wrong. Which, of course, is not surprising. Except for some wise talk here and there on his commitment towards making our civil service tick– thanks to afana Saulos Klaus Chilima who is chairman there – the good’ol professor should seriously consider swallowing some bitter healing tablets to keep himself and his buddies to sustain their shadowy political futures.

DPP cheer leaders

DPP cheer leaders

In fact, there is so much need for a therapist in the DPP camp that if we were to place an advert in The Nation or The Daily Times – beside some ‘manhood enlarger’ or ‘breast firming’ drug ad – we would in large, bold letters write: ‘URGENTLY WANTED: THERAPIST TO SAVE DPP FROM AN EARLY GRAVE.’

Within a space of not more than eight days, the DPP has staged some spasmodic Level 1 drama which has left most of us very afraid at, to use one Billy Mayaya’s very unfair description, how the “headless chicken” that has become our leadership will takes us through to the next polls in 2019 – if there will be any, that is.

It is unfortunate, dangerous rather, that instead of disciplining his parliamentarians who have resorted to beating staff at our New Parliament Building while parliament is in session, ankolo Kudontoni – who appeared from nowhere to steer the ruling DPP – was in town telling our good statutory corporations chief executive officers (CEOs) to play the bootlicker side if they wanted to continue eating from the party’s garden of prestige and opportunities.

Well, some of us thought that maybe ankolo Kudontoni had squeezed some sachets of our kill-me-quick liquor we banned the other day, which was being manufactured in huge amounts and is still available in large quantities at the warehouses in Luwinga.

We thought DPP’s nonsense would end there, but hell no. There was more drama coming along the way.

DPP’s president, and CEO of Malawi Inc. surprised, no, shocked all of us, when – instead of pensively attending to some matters of national importance such as plight of albinos, shoddy economy and looming strikes everywhere, currently eating Malawi up like cancer – like a brainless herder led a horde of his boys and girls to scribble some ‘Prof. Peter Mutharika Was Here’ graffiti at some police cell in Lumbadzi.

Of course, as usual Kondwani Nankhumwa was in town justifying Mutharika’s jamboree as some symbolic affair to show that no arrests will be made to settle political scores… blah… blah… blah …

But were their arrests in any way doctored political overtures? Didn’t they, after all, try to circumvent constitutional order after Pres Bingu died suddenly – we really are not sure what date – in April, 2012? Wasn’t the whole affair, even in layman’s language, treasonous after all?

Well, we were not surprised with Nankhumwa’s shallow defense though, which also included some cheap talk about everyone using their personal money on the day in question… blah…blah…blah …But to be gospel truthful,  the whole commemoration of the so-called ‘Liberation Day’ was a shame, and it should not happen again.

If the DPP government wants to erase its nasty legacy – of bludgeoning economic times, deplorable security lapses and a nauseating sort of political instability which we witnessed, not only once but countless times, prior and after the death of Bingu – then it must sweep its yard from inside before it clocks some good twelve months in office not so long from now.

The team at DPP must put its house in order. Ankolo Kudontoni must clean his foul mouth, because, to sound a bit prophetic here, it might cost the party a whole lifetime. It cannot be brushed aside that, much as everyone wants to sound as if these too are not related, a ruling party’s way of looking and doing things has serious repercussions on every government’s performance.

The DPP, for that is where most, if not all, of the president’s chief and junior advisors come from, must also make sure they advise their boss aptly on making plausible diaries regarding his functions. Surely, some trip to some cell for some nonsensical purpose is not the best thing our president should be having in his diary on a Wednesday. It is sheer unthoughtful, and laughable. Such things must stop.

For now, until these things are scraped off, it is Hail DPP, full of fluff…

  • Welcome to ‘War and Peace.’ Don’t miss on Tuesday.


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dee kay

If no Tumbuka can writing anything positive, is there any southerner who knows how to run a government?

Some comments here show some people filming Tribalism at its best. Just because Nyondo is from the North, explosives and guns are drawn by stupid tribalists from The South attacking him. Yet not much ferocity is shown when journalists from the centre and South say the same things about Peter and his dirty dpp cohorts. There is no Need for insulting each other using tribalism as an excuse. Just criticise someone based on facts or what he says not on tribalism. There are northerners who support dpp, so what message are you sending to these faithfuls of yours who happen… Read more »
Steve Chikapa

Young Moya & his marhuchanjara guru atikwana onsewa mbuzi zokha x2!


You work for MCP and you don’t appriciate the good our gvt is doing,fuck all Nyasa crew members.


Expected writings from a crying Tumbuka. They will finish acres and acres but this will not give them the presidency. whether you call Peter names but you will not change the fact that he is HE president of the Republic Of Malawi duly elected by the people of Malawi

Real Truth

Govt is made of 3 arms – the execitive, the legislator, the judiciary; therefore…….Please finish the sentence.


Atumbuka musatinyase,dziko ilo likulephera kupita patsogolo chifukwa cha atumbuka kuyankhula zinthu zopanda pake.


Comment plot 4 sale888650333


It’s business UNUSUAL in Malawi, Boma lalowa zibwana, izi ndiye masanje eni-eni

No Mtumbuka can write anything positive about Muthalikas the achievers after their Hill Chakufwa Chihanna died IMFA YOWAWA without testing presidency yet he was one of the early advocates for multiparty. Mtumbuka will never rule this country. But will die just like a barking dog that does not bite and only barks when it is inside its master’s fenced house. Of course sometimes some Tumbukas do reason and call a spade by its real name, but that can not be done with the Tumbukas of NYONDO caliber. If all the Nyondos can write their names and do jolly walk amongest… Read more »
Jihadi John

A mulakho nonse know that your era is coming to an end and it in very sudden manner…again!!! You think you will rule forever yet your heroes combined can’t even finish 10 yrs!! Fact!! After the death of this old laggard man which is very soon, you will relegated to third class….very soon!!!


Comment democracy and it’s rules must apply.u seem to have attended an msce recently


I dnt understand what are you tryng to say mmmmh paja ife amalawi ndichocho kumangonena zolakwika zabwino ayi

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