Malawi’s diplomat Sawerengera, wife Margret Mbilizi in sensational leaked e-mail spat
Malawi diplomat in Washington DC, Edward Sawelengela and his wife Margaret Asalele Mbilizi have launched a sensational e-mail spat, each accusing the other of not caring, and they are on the bring of break-up, Nyasa Times understands from the leaked letters.
In the correspondence now in public domain, Mbilizi accuses her husband for takking her “love and care for granted” and among other things and in turn Sawelengera writes that ‘Asalele’ Mbilizi is “distressed with fear and worry” to the extent that sometimes her actions turn violent.
Mbilizi pointed out in her reply that she gave up her life for Sawelengera he abused it.
“You treated me like a second class citizen. You did not care about my son. I had to seek medical help for him without your help. You did not put him on your health insurance. When he got better you have not done anything to get him on his feet. He lives in the bedroom like a prisoner with no new clothes or hope for a future,” reads part of her letter.
“For six months you did not have a conjugal relationship with me because you say I was talking bad about you. You told people and the President [Peter Mutharika] that you were going to divorce me. You got so close to [Violet] Skeva (works at the E,bassy) and confided in her,” she writes.
She also accused Sawerengela of arranging that she returns to Malawi on a one way ticket and that he has never given her money willingly and not built a house for the wife at her home in Michiru “as dictated by the matrilenal tradition.”
Mbilizi accuses her husband of letting power get to his head.
“ You forgot where you came from. You forgot that I was the one that gave you a second chance at life. By your own admission I am the one who pumped life into you by taking you along on the campaign trail. When the campaign was over you never fought for me to get a job as a reward for my sweat. Instead you and your friends selfishly arranged for a job for yourself. Ironically you accepted the job I was aspiring to without any regard for my feelings. I was hurt [that] you took a job as Ambassador when you knew fully that this was the job I wanted so badly and dreamed of all my life. It did not matter to you that I had lost my job, my life savings, my property to campaign for a party [DPP] that won the election. What mattered was [that] you should get a job and your life should move on not mine,” Mbilizi writes.
Mbilizi said she recalls Sawerengela talking with his Cabinet Minister friends while they were in New York telling him that they had convinced the President to make him Ambassador.
“Why didn’t you tell them then thatt you could not take that job because of the respect you had for me? You proved to me that you are a selfish person. You are not capable of laying down your life for another. It was better for us to have stayed and suffered in poverty together than for you to disgrace me by accepting to fill my shoes. I did not get the Ambassadorship because I did not want to sleep with anyone for a job. But what you did to me is even worse. Instead of sacrificing your own happiness for me, you accepted the position and relegated me to a house wife,” she wrote.
Mbilizi writes that when the couple entered diplomatic life, Sawerengela regretted having married her because he wanted to share his glory with the children not the wife.
“Recently you arranged for your daughter to bring your grandchild so that I should be taking care of her. This action underscores your belief that I am your slave. How can you expect me to take care of your grand children when you are not giving me anything let alone sending my son to college.
“So my husband do not label me as a slanderer. Everything I say to other people about you is from my experience with you. I thrive on the truth because it sets me free,” reads the letter.
Mbilizi advises Sawerengela to “ look in the mirror and acknowledge your misgivings. Unless you acknowledge and correct the mistakes you have made with our marriage there can be no forgiveness.”
She concluded: “I have decided to take my life back because you abused it. I will empower myself without your help because you failed to do that. You never wanted me to work or touch money. I am now walking in uncharted territory but I know I will be okay. I am a strong black woman and when I am brocken, I dust off and keep my head high.”
In his letter, Sawelengera states thta the two years and nine months they have been together, Mbilizi has displayed “a fluctuating temperament, oscillating back and forth.”
He writes: “ I decided to remarry after my first wife passed away and you are the one I chose to get married. You won over my heart as a mature, kind hearted, loving and caring woman. I was in love again and you, Margaret, fitted in very well as the surrogate mother to my children.”
Sawelengera said he may not be a perfect person, but he is not the monster.
“ I am a good man, loving and compassion. Somebody said fear stands for false evidence appearing real,” said the husband.
Sawelengera accuses Mbilizi of “character assassination”, urged her to desist from “the habit of bearing a false witness against innocent lives. This is the commandment from God. “
Reads the letter: “I urge you to put away all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander. Darling, desire for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good.
“I feel so sad, pained and heartbroken to see that a person of your status and stature, the one I have loved, go about spreading false report about me just because of petty differences with a motive of destroying my character and reputation. That is being evil. I plead with you not to join hands with wicked men to be a false and malicious witness. My dear my advice is you shouldn’t go around as a slanderer among those you claim to love, and you shouldn’t stand up against the life of someone who has not wronged you. Why doing this to me darling? To the extent of giving false stories to Nyasa Times to scandalize my name? I thank God, Nyasa Times’ official called today to ask me to give my side of the story.”
Sawelengera stated that if the relationship has failed to work, they should agree to separate” amicably with dignity “and continue to remain good loving friends.
“Let us avoid creating false stories about each other because that is wickedness. My bible tells me that, the wicked will not go unpunished. The bible further says that reckless people are people who act rashly, they are quick tempered, they pursue evil, they scoff at rebuke, they reject Christ as their Savior, and they deny God even with the clear evidences in the world; their days are numbered,” reads his letter.
Sawerenga advised Mbilizi not to be associated with “reckless people.”
A top government official has said the exchange of the letters is regrattable.
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Zikuoneka kuti mayiwa ndi vuto kwambiri pambali poti Hon Sawerengera nawonso ali ndi mabvuto awo
‘ I did not get the Ambassadorship because I did not want to sleep with anyone for a job’ i quote does this happen???????????? or its just out of frustration
Holy shit
I am an education specialist with advanced knowledge and expertise in policy development and analysis, educational leadership, higher education governance and administration, social foundations of education, gender studies, cultural diversity, and qualitative research methods. Earlier on in my career, I served as Deputy University Registrar at the University of Malawi, Director of Higher Education at the Ministry of Education, Science & Technology, and Special Assistant for Education to the President of Malawi. More recently I held appointments as Associate Professor of Educational Policy and Research at D’Youville College, Buffalo New York; Assistant Professor of Higher Education at Northern Illinois University, Dekalb Illinois; and Assistant Professor of Foundations of Education at the University of West Alabama , Livingston Alabama.
I hold a Ph.D. in Educational Policy Studies and a Master of Science in Education (MS.Ed) from Indiana University, Bloomington IN. She also has a Master of Education (M.Ed) and a Bachelor of Education (B.Ed) from Chancellor College, University of Malawi.
who holds this qualification in this context
Musatinyase eti,iyaaaaaaa!
Wicked woman. Even the face and dressing tell.
Amayi mumafuna zambiri !!!
When it gets to this, a recall decision is required. How then do they carry on with their duties? Also an assessment has to be done on requirements for deployment. There have also been other equally difficult situations regarding people in seriously sensitive posts.
And these are supposed to be our torch/ flag bearers!
Khaalidwe loipa a lhomwe inu mwanyazitsa dziko nthawiyayitali. Kupatsana umbassador 2019 mukubwerako basi kupita bkwanu kuThyolo jobless ife takeover.
The main lesson women and girls should learn from this story is that it is not good to just follow a man in the name of marriage. Stick to your career and never think of depending on a man finanically. They are stingy and abusive when in control of everything – buying you food, clothes, paying rent etc. They will do everything necessary to reduce you to a beggar. My mother (a house-wife) told me that a woman’s first husband should always be education and a job. I followed that advice and it has worked.
inu nanu muli ndi mavuto anu. ngati munakumana ndi zimbalangondo ndi mavuto anu amenewo. musamaopseze anzanu kuti amuna ndi oyipa. anzanu amuna omwewo mukuwanenawo akudya nawo bwino nkumakhala moyo wosangalala koopsa!
John Epha, in which world are you living in? There is no need for a woman to take a man’s name for marriage to work. Maggie Mbilizi has the right to use her maiden name. How many women who took their husbands’ name have ended up being divorced. Giving up one’s surname is a torture – you have to authenticate your certificates as well as change your passport, driving license etc. It’s worse when you divorce. Men advocate this archaic and patriarchal demand that women change their names simply because it pampers their ego and they are not the one’s who struggle with the repercussions of name changing. I’ve been married for 23 years and don’t use my husband’s name because what matters is a healthy relationship. I advise women not to change their maiden names. In addition, it’s unfortunate that Maggie Mbilizi, who is more educated than Sawerengela is not working because of making a BAD decision to marry this Mulhakho connected man. But what about the women who are more educated and high earners than their husbands. Are they supposed to become Mrs Lova (loafer) or Mrs Low Earner. Ndangodusamo!
When a family uses two different names children are the one who suffer and it raises questions as to why are these married people using two different surnames. It’s even suspicious when you go to pick your kids from school and yet you have different surnames. I have evidence to authenticate what am talking about. If in marriage you have two different surnames all you are asking are divisions as in this case. And in case of divorce the woman will be the loser as kids surname will be that of the man and their mother. So my point is if this family has kids they should be treated the same however if their only child is from the woman’s previous marriage the man will be reluctant to offer necessary support. It’s not about women freedom. Women have the choice to marry a man or remain single or anything they want to do but the consequences are divorce in most cases. We are talking about Malawian families not from America short loan relationships.
This man is a good man…very good man…its a pity that he has to ho through this. I pray that those who dont know him will not believe the allegations..the truth will eventually come out
from the story zikuonesa kuti madam wa nde ali ndi vuto. with all these issues he is still referring to her as Darling? mzibambo wachikondi kwambiri uyu.
Not surprising. Banjali silingalimbe. Atsikana abambowanso mabanja anatha, ali phwiiiiii kunyumbako. Its in the blood. uhule
Dr Margaret Asalele Mbilizi. Pa US mwakhala zaka zambiri even before musanakwatiwe ndi Che Dr Mawaya muli mbeta muli asikana. Munasiya zonse kubwera pa nyasa kuzayamba ndale. Munali candidate for chiradzulo for UDF kupikisana ndi Luke Jumbe. Koma atcheya anakusamusani nkukuimisani ku ndirande ndipo munagwa nayo vote. Ma degree muli nawo. Allowance ya Ku embassy mmalandira. Osangopeza ntchito Ku US ndi kachikheba kazikisisitani bwanji? Mukutipangisa manyazi.
Ndikuona ngati mamunayi mumamuderera popeza munafa zambiri. That’s the fastest way to chase a man.
Asele sending emails to her “husband” ? Weird. Total breakdown in communication.
So is there anything to to with us?
Good question, their editor has some shit to answer, not a sound, talk about hypocrisy.
The issue is who leaked the e-mails, the husband? the wife or a third party???
If they are married and a family why do they have different surnames? That’s a partnership not marriage hence in partnership the relationship can easily dissolve without one building a house for a (wife) partner in this case. You only build a house for somebody you are married to.
You said you have been six months without sleeping together, look here, me I’ve stayed over a year without doing that! It’s only the way you look at yourself.
Your writing is also questionable as it clearly shows that the son you have is “yours” not “ours” as such not taking care of him results from how you two live together. You are a bunch of political diehards not meant for marriage. You should not have been married but share your proceeds after winning the campaign.
So as your husband is the Ambassador, how do they address you two in meetings? Mr and Mrs or Mr and Miss? That’s a huge difference and cannot last forever.
John Epha, in which world are you living in? There is no need for a woman to take a man
s name for marriage to work. Maggie Mbilizi has the right to use her maiden name. How many women who took their husbands name have ended up being divorced. Giving up one's surname is a torture - you have to authenticate your certificates as well as change your passport, driving license etc. It's worse when you divorce. Men advocate this archaic and patriarchal demand that women change their names simply because it pampers their ego and they are not the one's who struggle with the repercussions of name changing. I've been married for 23 years and don't use my husbands name. I advise women not to change their maiden names. In addition, it’s unfortunate that Maggie Mbilizi, who is more educated than Sawerengela is not working because of making a BAD decision to marry this Mulhakho connected man. But what about the women who are more educated and high earners than their husbands. Are they supposed to become Mrs Lova (loafer) or Mrs Low Earner. Ndangodusamo!Totally agreed with you Nachisale. Please also advise Maggie to not claim a house after only two years of marriage. This is broad daylight theft.
ngati banja lake lili lotapitsa, la hayala, cohabitation, what u r saying is correct. but for a marriage blessed by the church and built on love, what u r saying is total rubbish. by getting married u become “one”. this is emphasized by using one sir name, sharing a bed and bedroom. And your children learn to recognize u as one.
if suppose u use 2 different surnames, which surname will the kids use?
very bad indeed, tell the truth to shame the devil people!
Friendly fire. Pachiweniweni. Alomwe alomwe. Mizwanya! Chonchi dziko lingatukuke!
I have worked with Saweregera and he is a very very good man. But one wonders how Mbilizi managed to convince Sawerengera to marry her. Bambo mukanapeza azimayi a bwinobwino osati izi. Maggie, the things you are talking about can not all be done within 2 years of marriage. And the exchange of the emails is not regrettable. The leaking is. And from the story, its clear its Maggie by her own admission who is leaking the emails. Akazi ongotola pa msikawa ndi mavuto sure,
Nkhani zoyalutsana sibwino akulu aklu mwanva mukuoneka kuti nonse ngodwala kale ndiye bwanji kumachita choncho
Hahahahaaaaaa… ma patient mwati? Kkkkkkk
Many areas to learn from this. If you are in marriage there are lines you can draw lessons. If you were once married and are planning to remarry you can pick some lessons here. If you are married to a politician here are some lessons for you. If you intend to marry a politician there are lines in this story for you. If you bankroll someone in politics with the thinking behind them repaying back with political favours get some lessons here. If want to know a bit what goes in governing parties my friend here are lessons for you. I can write and write and write about what you can learn here…………mbitee
Chilugamo mukuchidziwa nokha anthu awiri km poti zafika pa social network ndikugoti sorry km sikhani yovuta kwambiri. Ndiye poti zatero tagopagani separate kwa 6 months kt wina aliyese akaganize bwino mukatero mudzakumanenso ndikukhulupirira mudzapanga banj labwino.
Magret the problem with you is that you were assisting Edward not as your husband but as a way of getting a job. Now because you dont have a job and he has a job it has become a problem to you. So you wanted you to have a job and your huaband to be jobless. This is a shame. You are angry with him and you are no longer interested with him. Sure you cannot have sex under those circumstances because you have thrown out your roles as a wife and most likely you are always angry with him. Please Magret if you want marriage behave but if you just want a job then return home and start looking for one.
Wise words… the wife seems more interested in the job than the wife. If you really love the husband, why would you feel betrayed because he’s given the job?
My head is spinning ! I need a drink! Trying to figure out what the real issue is here . The biggest question that needs to be answered is who leaked the emails??? A bambo kampena a Mayiwo?……….
Aaaah chabwino tanva. Now tell us about this but rape rumour before u dive into other people’s scandals. Thank you and patiently waiting
but why are they sending each other dirty laundry via emails, They don’t talk to each other? eeeeh koma mabanjamu tisamaonane chonchi eti, bola umbeta nthawi zina sure
nanu inu, kodi mukatafuna mtedza wowola mmasiya kudya mtedza? mwangosowa mwamuna basi ndipo simukuziwa kuti mupeza bwanji wabwino.
Banana republic
Alomwe d! Nophiya kkkkkk ndi president wanu okonda miseche pitala, after kujeda chimunthuu banda now mumajeda sawerengela’s wife foolish pitala, you have failed to sort out blackouts problems koma. Busy kujeda
Ndiye chonchi mungakope investment and tourism? Mapoko pokopoko niwakazi. Every one in malawi government administration is useless!
I made the best choice to leave that country.
kwawo gule. send them back home azizatuwa kuno. iyaaaaaaaa
So on top of campaigning for them to win elections, you sold your properties to finance campaign. As if that was not enough, you were required to sleep with some ‘politician’ to get the ambassordorship. This is what makes politics a dirty game.
You still look relatively ‘young & in good heath’. Come back home and get married to a non-politician.
Kkkkkkkkkkkk
Very bad!